Sex Positivity
Have you been embarrassed to talk about sex or a sexual experience? Have you been talking with a friend, family member, or a healthcare provider and felt they judged you based on something you said pertaining to sex? Do you compare your sexual experience to media? When was the last time a provider asked you about your sexual health and experience? If you did discuss uncomfortable or painful sex, low libido, or any other sexual comment/concern, were you dismissed by your provider or by your friend? If you answered yes, to any of these, then this discussion of sex positivity can relate to you and your experiences. What is sex positivity and why is it is important?
Recently, there has been discussion about creating sex positive environments to allow for healthier expressions of love and intimacy. Sex positivity is less about being sexually active or having sex and more about the relationship and attitude surrounding yourself and others’ identities. Sex positivity is a term used to emphasize openness, nonjudgmental attitudes, freedom, and liberation about sexuality and sexual expression.
Sadly, sex negativity has dominated our culture. We are quick to judge and shame others based on their sexual desires, feelings, and concepts. This judgement comes from many sources: television, movies, radio, and social media or other people. Furthermore, sex education in the United States focuses less on sexuality and more on basic (and I mean very basic) anatomy and how NOT to become pregnant with a heavy emphasis on abstinence. This standardized education completely lacks detail and instruction regarding sexual organs and the physiology of sex. Education also lacks inclusivity of ones identify and expression of sex. But, let’s face it! When isn’t sex apart of our daily lives? Sex is intertwined in what we see, what we buy, how we feel, feelings about ourselves, and our feelings with and about others. Because it infiltrates our lives in a different aspects, why shouldn’t we view it in a positive manner?
Feeling comfortable with your own sexuality and identity.
Sex negativity not only dominates society, but it is present in the healthcare field as well. Discussion and willingness to inquire about sexual health and expression in the medical field is often ignored and/ or overlooked by healthcare providers in all fields. If a provider has inquired and engaged in a conversation with you (as opposed to glossing over the topic and onto the next question), then this is a wonderful and unique occurrence in traditional medicine. This also shows the provider is progressive in how they treat you as a whole.
Framework surrounding sex positivity includes physical, somatic, emotional, intellectual, social, and spiritual aspects of sexual practice in a positive way. When a sex positive environment has been created, an individual’s sexual intimacy, orientation, and eroticism can enhance that person’s personality, communication, and love. Sex negativity and positivity are viewed on a spectrum. People can fall anywhere along the scale with their comfort and view of sexuality. I challenge you to understand the relationship with your own sexuality and think about how you view others. Think about how you are impacted by society. And lastly, how can you impact your social sphere with sex positivity to encourage healthy communication, intimacy, and enhance relationships with ourselves and with others?
Be sex positive!